Steve Bannon Eats Trump’s Tax Returns, Punches Reporter

Actual Photo of Steve Bannon’s Meal

Steve Bannon, Donald Trump’s controversial new campaign CEO, got even with members of the press today when he forced them to watch as he ate a copy of Trump’s 2015 tax returns. Bannon, the combative Edidtor-in-Chief for Breitbart News, the online publication known for pushing an alt-right agenda, performed the stunt out of spite for reporters pressing him to explain Trump’s refusal to release his tax returns. Between bites, Bannon explained Mr. Trump’s reasons for keeping his tax returns under wraps.

“F**k you!”

It took Bannon three hours to consume the five foot high stack of documents and when he finished he belched, patted his stomach, punched a New York Times reporter and downed a glass of chardonnay. Clearly pleased with himself, Bannon waddled out of the room, pausing just long enough to slap a Washington Post reporter. Within minutes, however, Bannon found himself in an awkward position when he rushed into the nearest men’s room followed by a gaggle of reporters looking for a scoop.

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