Conway Calls Trump “Steaming Pile of Doodoo”

Actual Photo of Kellyanne Conway Slowly Dying Inside

The Donald Trump campaign has taken the lowering debate expectations game to a new level. With the much anticipated first debate between Trump and Hillary Clinton set to take place Monday night, campaign manager Kellyanne Conway went on CNN last night to tell Don Lemon why she thinks her boss is a blustering knucklehead unfit to be commander in chief.

“Donald Trump is a racist, misogynistic, mean-spirited charlatan and I have no doubt Hillary will clean his clock. Let’s face it, Don, the man consistently spews the intellectual equivalent of raw sewage. His moral compass points directly at himself. If you bit Donald Trump he’d taste like stinky socks wrapped in frog intestines, dipped in BP oil slick oil and deep fried in regret, broken dreams and regret.”

When Don Lemon asked Conway how she could work for someone she despises, she shrugged off the question.

“Americans want change. They’re fed up with competent, thoughtful leaders who understand the complexities of the 21st century. They want a man who makes a steaming pile of doodoo look like a Boston cream pie and in this race there is only one steaming pile of doodoo. Donald Trump is the steaming pile of doodoo America deserves.”

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