93 Million Clinton Sex Tapes!

Actual Photo of Donald Trump Lying to Sarah Palin about Something

Donald Trump called in to Fox and Friends this morning to level a new attack against Hillary Clinton, accusing Clinton of embarking on an ambitious attempt to steal the election by sleeping with every voter in America. Trump said he will back up his claim tomorrow with the release of 93 million sex tapes.

“Unbelievable! Hillary Clinton, very meticulous, she’s been working her way through the alphabet to the tune of like 93 million voters so far and you know she’s barely into the g’s which is very sad but no wonder she has no stamina and by the way, for you h’s to z’s, you should check out these very disgusting sex tapes because I’m told they paint a very scary, a disgusting picture of someone who, you know if she were smart, she would sleep with four or five at a time but she, but this woman will do anything to get elected and you know some of these tapes, we’re talking very ugly men, fat and disgusting women, many many women over twenty-three, people who use public transportation… so sad!”

Trump tried to put to bed the suggestion that he’s desperate to change the subject after reports he may not have paid income tax for twenty years.

“If I had a dollar per view of those disgusting sex tapes, I still wouldn’t pay taxes because I’m a genius, which by the way I’m charging a dollar per view of these disgusting sex tapes and donating it all to a very legitimate charity I won’t name because why would I give that information to ISIS because I am a genius!”

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