Klan Re-Thinks Trump Endorsement

Actual Photo of a Closeted Trump Supporter

The Ku Klux Klan has had it up to its eyeholes with Donald Trump. A leaked internal memo from KKK headquarters in Jackson, Mississippi, offers a rare glimpse into the inner workings of the Klan and its struggle to come to grips with a candidate whose implosion threatens to taint the white supremacy brand.

“Wake up white people! First off, a big shout out to brother Wilfred’s beautiful white wife Cindy, who baked white chocolate chip cookies for last week’s meeting. Yum! Now, a few members are saying our chapter’s support of Donald Trump is making us look bad. Well don’t soil your white sheets! This ain’t no time to abandon brother Trump. Sure, Donald gropes women, lies when he talks and scares the crap out of anybody with crap in ’em. On the other hand, he’s white. Also, unlike Nasty Hillary, he’s got a white pecker, which it’s worth repeating is white. So those of us who ain’t convicted felons, let’s go out there and vote for Donald Trump come November 28th! Make America white again!”

Despite the pro-Trump position taken by Klan leadership, one chapter member told thefloydspin many rank-and-file Klansmen won’t be voting for Trump.

“A bunch of us are fixing to vote for Hillary. Ain’t nothing wrong with nasty.”

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