Trump Deports Statue of Liberty!

Actual Photo of a Foreigner Attacking a Bird

She’s outta here! “President” Donald Trump signed an executive order today setting in motion the deportation of the Statue of Liberty. The order comes at a time when the administration is dramatically expanding the pool of undocumented immigrants it targets for deportation. Press secretary Sean Spicer said the order was necessary because the lady has overstayed her welcome.

“We checked and she doesn’t have proper documentation! All she has is this lame tablet she carries around engraved with a bunch of lame platitudes! Boy, talk about the exact kind of people we want to keep out! The last thing we need is some┬átired, poor, large green woman lugging a flaming torch into our country! And that’s why the president has instructed the immigration service to unbolt her and send her back to Germany! Yeah, that’s right, I said Germany! We won the election so Germany! Shut up!”

After signing the order, Trump took to Twitter to tout his hard line on immigration.

“The sad un-American Statue of Liberty is history. I hear millions have been inside her! I never touched her!”

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